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Meeting people is easy, developing a friendship is more complicated; it takes patience and initiative. When I was in my early fifties, my husband, Mark, and I took a rafting trip in Idaho.
On the trip, we met Lou and Victor and their children and we all hit it off. The night the trip ended, Lou called from her home in Las Vegas telling us how much she and Victor had enjoyed meeting us. I was touched by the gesture and a month later we invited Lou and Victor to a party we were hosting on Long Island. To our delight and surprise they flew to New York and spent the weekend with us.
We also had a lot of laughs. But if Lou had not made that first call, we probably would never have seen each other again. So I learned that a major key to making a friend involves letting someone know you like her—or him.
This knowledge became especially important five years ago when Mark died. I knew that in addition to my grief over his loss, my life would change drastically.