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A t a bar on my first night in Kalimantan, Indonesian Borneo, two Chinese exotic dancers from Jakarta sitting at my table offered me an ecstasy pill. It was true. I'd flown in on a last-minute assignment. I had just one contact in Banjarmasin and it was a shaky one. It wasn't much to go on, but he was all I had, so earlier that day I had checked into a hotel and gone off to find him.
I found his guest house at the bottom of an alley beside the river. It was a small, clean place, cheap and functional, the sort of establishment that heads the Places to Stay list in a Lonely Planet guidebook. They were ecstatic. Perhaps I should have taken that as a warning. He was a stocky man with a winning smile. What I wanted to achieve was an impossible task in an impossibly short space of time. He listened and frowned.
It will be hard, but you can do it," he said slowly. You should meet the head of the department. We should also ring ahead to Pontianak and tell them you're coming. Are you a member of the Lion's Club? Everybody's who's who in Banjarmasin is a member. I became a member three years ago. You're lucky. It's tonight. You might make some useful contacts. And so that night, my first in Banjarmasin, my first in Kalimantan, dressed in the best attire I could cobble together from the crumpled contents of my backpack, I found myself in a banquet hall surrounded by Banjarmasin's worthies.
Now, I've never attended a meeting of the Lion's Club in my own country, or anywhere else for that matter, and I have no idea what its members discuss or hold forth on. I still don't. The proceedings in Banjarmasin were carried out in Bahasa, a language I can use to order a plate of fried rice, find the nearest toilet and buy a beer.