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Two years ago, my husband confessed that he had been looking at porn throughout our marriage. Immediately following his confession he basically shut me out completely. Porn had been the one and only thing I had ever asked him to make sure he was honest about.
I was completely blindsided. I had absolutely no clue. He had no problem giving me his passwords, never being alone with his phone, putting internet software on and so on. However, he completely shut me out emotionally and stopped talking to me.
Since his confession, I gave birth to our fourth child, which was especially hard because my husband is gone with the military and we move around a lot. I feel like a horrible mother.
I hate everything about myself, and I feel so completely alone. I find myself getting more and more resentful and so angry toward God and men , in general. My heart is constantly racing, and I feel like the more time passes, the more hurt I feel. Any little things that happen during the day just increase my pain and bitterness. My husband is a good man, but he refuses to talk to me. Every man in my life has betrayed me. So are all men just gross, sex-crazed, weak things that have no self-control?